Tequila/Monk

Alternate reality

March 10, 2011
For the first time in a long time, last night I had one of those "events" where I could very clearly hear other voices while laying down, not really dreaming, but very groggy. We've had some bad weather here -- extremely windy -- so I started sleeping in the hallway again, as the windows are rattling so loud that I won't be surprised when they blow out one day. As a result the sleep wasn't very good, and at some point during the middle of the night I could hear these other voices very clearly. I knew where I was, I was laying on the floor in the hallway, but I could also hear these voices. The weird thing about this hypnogagic mental state is that there is a lot of fear involved. You know where you are, you're 99% certain of it, but there's also this fear that tells you to get up and check things out. Because I haven't had this happen in a long time I did get up and check things out, and as usual, it pissed me off after I got up. I can usually control that fear when this happens often enough, but when it's a surprise like last night, I can't control that fear. Again, you know it's not "real", not real in the sense of this physical world, but you feel compelled to get up and check things out. (Or, if you're new to the experience, you get up just because of the fear, lol.) I'm always amazed at how quickly these things happen for me. For a variety of personal reasons I haven't been meditating much until the last few days, and each night lately something new has happened.
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