Six hours of ... something
Wow. That’s all I can say. I got out of bed at 7am, but I was feeling very different. I knew who I was and where I was, but something was wrong, I was a little out of it.
Some time last night I remember thinking about the old tv show Moonlighting, and I remembered some lines from it, something like, “I’m sorry to say, I’m sad to report ...”, followed by some other lines. So this morning I Google’d that phrase, took an image, and as I was about to post it on Facebook ... I won’t say that I lost control, that’s too strong a word ... but something was coming from me that wasn’t me.
I wrote a long “poem” (for lack of a better term) to go along with the image, but then my mind/brain kept going, kept racing, like it was extracting all of this information from another place. It felt like it was being pushed through me.
I had to return my heart monitor to the doctor’s office, and I know that I drove there, then drove to Starbucks, and then to Walmart, I know that I did all those things, I remember talking to people, but it was all very dreamlike.
By the time I returned home, I was shaking. I quickly posted another short poem that was in my mind on Twitter, but I felt like I had to go to bed. I was “more there than here”, “ungrounded” as they say at TMI, and it was making me sick.
In bed I decided to listen to another TMI recording. I don’t know why, maybe just to push me over the edge, to see what would happen. After that I still felt sick, so I went to sleep. That was followed by a series of lucid dreams and OBEs, finally concluding with me being in an apartment. I thought it was my apartment, but I knew someone else was in it, I heard them, so I called out, “Hello”. An older woman came out, and I was instantly very strongly attracted to her. Though she was older and didn’t look like anyone I know, I wanted to make love to her as soon as I saw her.
That being said, I didn’t know who she was, or why she was in my apartment. I asked her who she was, and she said something like, “Silly, I’m your downstairs neighbor.” Just then an enormous black bird flew up and hit her window, once, then twice. She went over to the window and did something, I don’t remember what.
My attraction to her was ridiculous. I wanted to kiss her all over. When she came back from the window she could tell that I was crazy with lust, and she opened her blouse, and I began kissing her chest. It tasted like she had just put some moisturizing lotion on it, but I didn’t care, I just wanted to have her, to be next to her and inside her.
Shortly after this I snapped out of it completely. While I lay in bed, I knew I was back to being “me”. Even though I was there for all of the events I described, and I think I was in control, I wasn’t myself, or maybe more accurately, it wasn’t just me.
When I began shaking I knew something was going on, I knew that some information was trying to come to me and through me from somewhere else faster than I could process it, but I couldn’t handle it, I couldn’t process it fast enough, so in a way I was also shutting down.
In retrospect I think the older woman in the last OBE/dream (I don’t know what to call it) lived in Florida, perhaps in a condo unit. Her skin was darkly tanned, almost orange-ish, and her clothing was light.
I have no idea what to make of the large black bird hitting the window twice. I felt like it wanted to get in, but it couldn’t. It was huge, maybe the size of a pelican or bald eagle.
As soon as I kissed her chest and tasted the lotion, I began to snap out of it. Almost instantly I woke up in bed, and knew the event was over.
The thing I thought of very quickly is that when I have discussions like this with other “people” in these events, I need to say something like, “I think I’ve hit my head, I can’t remember who you are; what’s your name? How do I know you? What’s my name? Where are we?”, that sort of thing.
When it all ended it was 1:05pm. I feel like myself again, but I’m also exhausted. I’ve had a concussion before, and that’s how I feel right now, like I’m recovering from a concussion. I can work, I can function, it’s just me at the controls, but I’m very, very tired. Whatever that was, whatever happened, that episode lasted almost six hours.
Again, I don’t want to make too much of what happened, because it wasn’t like I was completely possessed or anything like that. But once things started happening, it was like I was in a fog, or more accurately, a trance. I knew I had to go to the doctor’s office, and I wanted to go to Starbucks and Walmart, but how I did those things ... it’s not a mystery, but it was all very dreamlike.
The last thing I wrote
The last thing I wrote during the episode was this:
A lavender sunset,
an addict for a friend;
I didn’t choose either,
they just happened.
“I” wanted to post that on Facebook along with a picture of a beautiful sunset, but fortunately I didn’t do that also.