December 29, 2017
For a little while last night I was walking around the apartment, doing things, and generally thinking I was awake. Then when I went into the bathroom and flipped on the light switch and the lights didn’t come on, I knew I was asleep. I don’t know why light switches don’t work in this state, but I hope to find out one day. (It used to freak me out, but these days I just think, “Oh, crap, I’m asleep.”)
December 19, 2017
I started practicing yoga with Judi Rice when she taught introductory courses in the evenings at a local university. She taught one class a week for eight weeks, introducing a few new poses each week. This was back in the late 1990s, and I was in my late thirties.
September 28, 2017
In the strangest thing that’s happened to me recently, a man who is a local celebrity died four days ago. And then he died again today.
I wish I could tell you the details, but I don’t even know them. All I know for sure is that in my mind he clearly died three or four days ago. If anyone had asked me yesterday if he was alive, I would have 100% said, “No, he died a few days ago.” And then on the radio today they announced that he just passed away during the night.
September 13, 2017
Tequila writing here tonight, and filed under “Weird Thought of the Day” ... after you break up with someone, every once in a while you look back and think, “I wish I knew that was the last time we were going to have sex,” or more generally, “I wish I knew that was the last time we were going to do XYZ together.”
I don’t if I’d change anything, or could change anything, but it’s more like a feeling that you might remember that thing more if you knew going in, “This is the last time.”
September 10, 2017
I got my butt kicked this morning. I went to bed late, got up at 7:30am, decided I needed a little more sleep, then woke up in a hospital after a surgery.
Long story short, I had some sort of surgery on my abdomen, and the recovery from that surgery was miserable and exhausting. By the time I woke up in my own bed I could barely move from the exhaustion.
September 4, 2017
Due to the high doses of necessary medications I’ve been taking, I haven’t had many interesting lucid dreams or vision-like things recently, but last night I had a brief vision.
For some reason I was looking out the window of the first home I ever bought, and as I was doing so, my wife’s grandmother appeared and began walking across the front lawn towards the window. I was lucid at this point, and asked how she was doing — she passed away almost 20 years ago — and she said something like, “fine” (I don’t remember her exact words.)
August 18, 2017
Nurse: Do you wake up tired?
Me (muttering): You have no idea.
Doctor: What’s that?
Me: Yes, I wake up tired.
August 15, 2017
Last night I was in the middle of a normal dream, when I suddenly gained awareness a little bit. A younger version of my mother was standing next to me while I was sitting at my usual work desk, and she said something I can’t remember now, but it struck me as sad. She also asked if I thought my sisters would like something, but I couldn’t figure out what she was referring to.
August 5, 2017
As a brief note to self, just because other people don’t experience the world the way you do, that doesn’t make them right and you wrong.
In my case I started having OBEs spontaneously, and then through meditation and yoga practice I’ve been able to build on whatever this is that I was born with. My only goal is to try to prove that these things are real, and through many experiences, such as premonitions and the card tests, I’ve certainly done that, if only to a small extent. Hopefully I’ll get even better at this as time goes on. If other people think I’m crazy, so be it.
July 29, 2017
After seeing a motivational image a few days ago, I’ve been debating about whether I should write any more about the “special experiences” people can have when they go deep into meditation and yoga. Specifically, I’ve been thinking that maybe I should just do what others do and say, “Oh, yes, meditation and yoga can be very good for your health, give them a try.”
July 26, 2017
After many nights of PK/TK dreams and a little flying, I had great fun yet again last night. It started with a dream in a friend’s driveway. I was doing something in the dream, but then lost consciousness. I came back to awareness at the exact same place, but I noticed something in the dream wasn’t the same as before. With some great amount of will I was able to restore that thing to the way it was previously.
June 18, 2017
I try to look at the things I do with lucid dreams and out of body experiences from a scientific and engineering standpoint: How can I prove (or disprove) these things are real? How can I make them repeatable? How can I help other people experience these things?
June 17, 2017
After eating well, meditating, and practicing yoga every night for a few nights, I had a series of fun TK/PK dreams overnight. After that, I had one of those mornings where you want to wake up at a certain time so you can get some things done, but you wake up a minute before the alarm is going to go off and you’re already in a deep, meditative state, so you turn off the alarm and ride the wave for a few hours.
June 8, 2017
As far as I know, I all but died this morning just after 3am. The story goes like this:
I went to bed around 11pm after quietly and mildly practicing yoga for about 45 minutes. I woke up at 1:20am to go to the bathroom. I fell back to sleep, then woke up some time before 3am.
June 7, 2017
I was talking with a friend recently, and they asked, “Are you one of those ‘spiritual but not religious people?’”
After I answered that question they asked, “Are you interested in a spiritual life?”
After some thought I replied, “I’m not interested in a spiritual life — at least not just for the sake of living that way. But I am extraordinarily interested in the life of the spirit. And if that drives me to live what you’d call a spiritual life, so be it.”
May 28, 2017
A sad part of what I experience is that I haven’t had a relative die in almost twenty years who didn’t die without me knowing it first. The only positive things about seeing death beforehand are, (a) you get to see a place that was important to them, and (b) you can occasionally stop a preventable death.
Visions of death happen in a place that’s important to the person who is about to die
When I say that you get to see a place that’s important to the person who’s about to die, I mean that that’s where the vision of death typically appears.
April 29, 2017
Two days ago I was talking to a woman I’ve known casually for about a year. We’ve been getting along great, and I really like her. When I told her I wanted to go to a particular event nearby she made a motion to start taking off her wedding ring, and said maybe she could go with me.
I’m just a little out of practice at any sort of dating thing, so the first thing I need to say is that I had never noticed that she was married. We’ve always just talked like old buddies, so that was a surprise.
April 6, 2017
One thing I’ve been struggling with lately is: When you can’t drink margaritas or have sex any more, where is the fun in life?
More generally that can be stated as: As you get older and your health deteriorates, you’ll be able to do fewer and fewer things that you enjoy, until one day you won’t be able to do any of them. At that point, what’s left?
I’m struggling with this question because Tequila is more in control of things right now than Monk. I know what Monk’s answer would be, I just don’t like it.
March 25, 2017
If my dreams are a reliable indicator, my aunt will pass away in the next two weeks or so. She’s been sick for a while now, so this isn’t a surprise, and there’s nothing anyone can do about it.
FWIW, historically these dreams have been like this:
March 17, 2017
“Wait, wait,” I said, sitting on her bed as she took her clothes off. “We shouldn’t do this.”
“Why not, baby,” she asked. “Don’t you want me?” She playfully slid off her pants, then came to me and sat on my lap. As she put her hands behind her back to release her bra, I grabbed her arms to stop her.
“Ooh, do you like it rough, baby,” she asked.
“What? Yes. No. Wait, that’s not what I’m talking about.”
“What are you talking about?”